Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Too much gin, very little bucket
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
