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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...

  (708): View more from Illinois

  I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....

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• (514): View more from Quebec

  Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?

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• (620): View more from Kansas

  He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.

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  25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.

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• (580): View more from Oklahoma

  You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.

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• (210): View more from Texas

  If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.

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• (562): View more from California

  I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.

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• (727): View more from Florida

  Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea

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• (646): View more from New York

  I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?

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• (530): View more from California

  Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas

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