You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
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