i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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