i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize