Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
