At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
