Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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