is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
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