**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
North Korea, Best Korea!
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
