Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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