but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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