My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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