she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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