I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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