38 yer olds are good kisserssss
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Alive.
So much puke
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
