it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
