we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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