You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
my liver is dry heaving
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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