I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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