There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize