and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
