Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize