Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
