you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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