did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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