If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
