I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
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