we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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