Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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