This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
hey, what are you doing tonight?
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.