Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
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You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
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If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
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