you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
