How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
