I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
