seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
