4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Nicole vs. Life
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize