yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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