I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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