oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize