i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
