Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
