How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
