ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies