Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
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