suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize