you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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