Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize