Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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