as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
