Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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